


Carved Into My Skin

by littlehuntress



Series: Leather & Blood [1]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Slavery, M/M, Rebellion, Royalty, Slave!Merlin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-30
Updated: 2017-01-30
Packaged: 2018-09-19 20:47:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9459848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littlehuntress/pseuds/littlehuntress
Summary: Choosing between the rebellion and his heart confuses and tears Merlin apart.They shouldn't feel the way they do. Arthur doesn't belong to him.





	

The dissonance in the room is a mixture of a vociferous crowd and the urgency of their demands. Merlin remains in a corner, hiding from the rest of them watching the scene unfold. This meeting is no different from the other dozen they've had. Mordred speaks, they listen and nod and disagree with the dip of their lips. In the end it's all the same. The assembly plots together the fall of the Royal Family. Merlin gets it. They want to be freed from invisible shackles, the marks and leather around their wrists, differentiating them from the rest of the citizens. They ask for a better treatment and not be handled like cattle. 

When Freya asked him for his help he hesitated, they met at the Enhancement Academy, together they learned to serve and follow orders, to remain quiet, willing. Refusing in the face of a friend was a test for him. But the black and blue marks on Freya's arms, angry and swelling were enough to seal his alliance with the rebellion. His friends are like family to him. He couldn't say no, not even when his heart contracted in his chest at the idea of commiting treason. At the thought of him breaking Arthur's trust.

Merlin is the rebellion's biggest asset. Being Prince Arthur's favorite--the only one Merlin reminds himself--personal servant makes him the key of their fight. It's no secret the prince has a special predilection for him no one understands. Without him they can't get close to the Royal Family. He's inside knowledge. The dragon emblem on his shoulder makes him invaluable. 

What they don't know about are the nights Merlin lets Arthur touch him out of his own volition. That they kiss and fuck and have learned new ways to drive each other mad. How much Merlin loves to ride Arthur's cock, painfully slow, nails digging in his chest, dragging it for as long as he can, loving every second of Arthur coming apart beneath him. Or how foolishly caring and passionate Arthur can be and how it hurts Merlin with happiness he shouldn't be feeling but it's all the more precious because of it. They'd probably change their opinion about him if they knew. 

He hears Mordred mention his name, his heart beats fast with nervousness all eyes are on him in an instant. It's not his turn yet, he isn't ready, his head's a mess and full of Arthur. He's about to excuse himself when Kara directs their attention somewhere else. The tightness in his chest receding. He doesn't know what he's doing anymore. At first everything seemed simple, get them into the castle and make King Uther listen to their demands. Refuse nothing less than a change to the laws concerning personal servants, banning ownership and abuse. Dictating they receive a salary as regular valets and maids do. Now the narrative of the rebellion is a convoluted mess that changes as new suggestions are added and get twisted and the anger turns into desire for revenge. Many want blood. 

A part of Merlin feels he does't belong with them anymore. He's different from them. An oddity. 

He hides things from Arthur and betrays the rebellion too when he kisses Arthur with eyes closed and gets lost in him. When Arthur touches him like they're real lovers, easy and gentle, when they fuck and he asks for more and he wants and _needs_ and it's messy and hot and he wishes Arthur would stay inside of him, on him long after he comes and his breathing's slowed down. When they kiss languid and soft and his body can barely contain him. When he repeats Arthur's tender words and means it in every single language he's learned. When they do nothing but sleep and occupy the same space like it'd be impossible for them not to.

He thinks back to that morning, the sun barely out dying the sky with a faint orange glow, waking up the world. Arthur's skin glued to his, his breaths coming out in calm puffs unaware of the reality around him. He looked so young and fragile enveloped in the morning light and there wasn't enough air in the room because every attempt at breathing Merlin made was futile. He let his fingers skim down the flesh of Arthur's chest, mindful to not wake him until he found a red mark he left with his teeth on his way down the night before and it was easier for him to swallow around the bitterness on his tongue. For a little while. Merlin's lips had tasted of salt and the memory of Arthur's tongue and hands fresh on his mind and skin. Marks in the shape of Arthur's fingers painted on his hips. When he moved he could still feel Arthur _in_ him, his hole stretched and used. Arthur had kept him awake until it was difficult for Merlin to distinguish between their heartbeats. He could've stayed there in that big bed waiting for Arthur to regain consciousness, ask him to forego his duties and stay with him. To take him again and keep them hidden until Merlin's fear turned into a serene river. But he didn't. Prying himself from Arthur had been one of the hardest things he's ever done. 

Some days he wants to run away, get lost, forget about everything, except he'd keep looking back wondering if Arthur already noticed his absence and is looking for him. 

Then he realizes how stupid they are. How naive and reckless. They shouldn't feel the way they do. Arthur doesn't belong to him, not really, it's a beautiful folly and the worst part is that not only him but Arthur has also let himself believe they can have everything, that he is free to give himself to a lowly personal servant. In the near future the king will make him marry some beautiful princess or a pretty boy with ties to royalty. It's the life they have to live. A truth they can't deny him.

Arthur will always have him if he wants to. Despite it all.

If only he could keep Arthur.

He snorts hating himself for his maudlin thoughts, thankfully no one pays him attention this time. They'll do once he takes Mordred's place. He wishes they actually listened to him when he talks. He's in favor of non-violent actions. Them? Who knows anymore. He's torn between his feelings and his beliefs. His duty to his friends and his loyalty to Arthur. 

Stupid. So stupid. 

They're far from a happy ending. 

He might not show visible marks, red and violent, purple and swollen. But Arthur's fingerprints are burned on his skin, every kiss and touch seared. There's not a spot on his skin and heart Arthur hasn't touched. His bruises a myriad of hues invisible to the naked eye. Arthur never struck him but he's loved him and that's the real danger. The violence is in every kiss and promises they will have to break, because one of them will have to live without the other. Inevitably.


End file.
